Several years ago I worked at a book publisher that specialized in books for psychologists and psychiatrists and the like. Given that there was only three or four hours of actual work for me to do on any given day, I have a crapload of drawings I did during this time. I remember having this picture left on the pad on my desk overnight. The next day, the bosses’ wife had a post-it attached to it that said ‘No you don’t’. I thought that was kind of funny. The boss was a retired psychologist and sometimes he’d give me these knowing looks. It was great.
A lame attempt at scientific illustration. At least I got to write anus.
Sometimes it’s fun to make-up animals. This particular freakshow is an amalgamation of several different animals. Frightening and oddly erotic.
Jeez. What a letdown. Being in Tampa, I knew for about a week that Wilma wasn’t going to hit us directly, but I kinda wanted to see some shit flying around. Some rain and wind. Boring. Anyhow. At 2 in the morning on the 24th, our power went out briefly. Being horribly dependent on technology and such, me and k.t had to find something to do.
With the candles and flashlights going, we made some shadow puppets onto pieces of paper. This is what I converted a simple outline into. Weird.
I freaking love zombie movies. Love them. That being the case, I like to draw zombies a lot. A lot. Here’s a nice skinless one I drew a year or so ago. Zombies rule. There’s been a sudden popularity in Hollywood to make some zombie movies, you know, for the kids. My favorite zombie movie is still the original Night of the Living Dead. Number two would have to be Dead Alive for sheer gore factor. Check it out if you haven’t seen it. Fantastic movie from Peter Jackson before he started effing around with hobbits and such.
I finally got around to using the graph paper I bought several months ago at the local grocer. I used to draw on graph paper a lot when I was younger. Attempts to draw Space Invaders and robots and crap. This particular image is a lame self-portrait.
This is the other picture drawn at the same time as the one below. The happy diarrhea cake was k.t.’s idea. Yet another reason she’s the dame for me!
My girlfriend, k.t., and I are both artists in two distinctly different styles. Ever since we’ve gotten together and such, we’ve been collaborating on projects. This one is a favorite of mine. A weird business man we drew after passing the paper back in forth. This is the first out of two we did at the same time. I’ll post that one as well.
So I’ve been trying for a while to digitize everything I’ve ever drawn should some catastrophe wipe all the boxes of papers and crap I got stashed in my closet. This is a fantastic example of the shit I was into drawing in middle school. I did this for my Spanish class in, I want to say, sixth grade. That would make it 1988 or so. I still draw more or less the same kind of monsters and junk, but my anatomy is a little better. Spanish, I have mostly forgotton. Oh, well.
One of the stupid little things I like to do on my lunchbreak at my soul-crushing retail supervisor job, is deface company property. Usually reserved to brochures and various paper propoganda. I drew this little picture on a page of a safety awareness packet that was more or less common sense stuff anyway. No grab-ass while on a ladder. Duh.
After a day or two of me not adding anything in particular to it I noticed a portion added by someone else. That person, not even able to draw a convincing asian stereotype on the first try, I think ruined the picture. I wrote a message and left it in the breakroom.
I figured out who drew this. It was this stocker kid who’s a fairly recent hire. I have no good things to say about him at all. Anyhow, he formed a rebuttal.
So this douche mistakes my self-deprecating humor as an admission of my inferiority as an artist. I draw better than him in my sleep with a matchstick and that doesn’t even make sense. I’m not the best artist of ever or anything but here’s an example of this fool’s artisitic ability.
So there you have it. The asian guy. Goku (I think that’s his name) from Dragon Ball Z and the worst renditions of Homer and Bart Simpson I have ever seen. This isn’t even bad in a good way like that god-awful thrift-store painting. It’s just bad.